Often we focus on doing things to improve ourselves. We tell ourselves to do this and that.
However, if we really want to better ourselves, we should not forget to avoid doing certain things as well.
It’s like decorating your house. How can you make your home nice and beautiful with all the new decoration items that you bought if you don’t clean your house from cluttering rubbish? We won’t start decorating it until we make sure it’s clear from junks and dirt, will we?
The same principle applies to better yourself.
You should avoid doing certain things to clear yourself so that you can improve and grow yourself.
Things to avoid for our self-growth
1.Don’t underestimate yourself
I’d like to put this as number one because we’ll definitely need our self-confidence to be able to attain our goals.
Consequently, we must not underestimate ourselves.
However, sometimes we doubt ourselves and don’t feel good enough to do things we want to do.
Especially when they are new things. Often we decide that we can’t do it even before we give it a try.
So the first thing we should not do is underestimate ourselves. Don’t let self-doubt hinder our inner strength and energy to form into our best effort.
2. Don’t be judgmental towards others and yourself
It’s okay to have opinions and such. But don’t jump into conclusion when things are not crystal clear and factual.
And when it comes to people, it’s quite easy to become biased and prejudiced. But, it’s important to be non-judgmental so that we can understand things and issues better that can lead to better relationships, peace of mind, and possibilities of new opportunities.
It’s equally important to be non-judgmental towards ourselves too. Many of us may be guilty of being self-judgmental, particularly when we want to challenge ourselves to do something new.
Instead of telling ourselves to try to be more resourceful and give our best shot, we feel discouraged and fear of failure. These put limiting beliefs in our minds.
3. Don’t spend too much time on social media
You may or may not agree with this one. I admit that there are benefits of social media e.g. connect with people, improve communication, make relationships with others, etc.
There are, however, disadvantages of social media as well.
Especially if we spend too much time on it. As it can distract us from doing crucial things, make us procrastinate, and waste time unnecessarily.
So it’s time to review whether we utilise the social media to our advantages or the other way around.
4. Don’t compare yourself to other people
It is advisable to pick someone to look up to as your hero when you start something new. Someone who has already made his/her way to success in whatever you want to achieve.
But, you must not compare yourself one to one.
Yes, you can learn from their experience. But you can’t expect everything to happen to you absolutely the same way it happened to them. Because you are you.
What you’ve been through all your life may be similar to some people, but it won’t be totally the same. Also, your character and personality must be taken into account as well.
So, you must stop comparing yourself to others if you want to let yourself grow and reach your true potential.
5. Don’t let others’ opinions affect you
I personally agree that at some points, other people’s opinions matter. However, we shouldn’t let those opinions affect us to the extent we’re more worried about what people think than worrying about what we need to do.
As long as you do things by the book — in a way that you don’t do any wrongdoings to others to attain your goal, you respect other people’s differences, and you don’t cross the rules and boundaries, you shouldn’t let others’ opinions get to you.
6. Procrastination is one of the things to avoid for a better you
Every one of us does procrastinate sometimes. From delaying to make a decision on something, putting off starting the exercise, avoiding the task due to fear of its difficulties, delaying to do our housework, etc.
But we know that time doesn’t come back. Once it’s gone, it’s gone.
So really, trying our best to stop procrastination should be one of our top priorities.
Because procrastinating will only make us lazy and cause regrets at the end.
7. Avoiding Gossip another thing
Nobody likes being talked behind their backs, right? So, if we don’t want others to gossip about us, then we should avoid gossip and those who talk about others behind their backs.
If I come across someone who talks about someone else, that’s just a clear sign for me to keep a distance.
Common sense tells me that this person talks about others to me, chances are she would do the same about me to others.
8. Don’t consume too much sugar
We all know that consuming too much sugar is not recommended for our health. Diabetes type 2, risk of heart disease, weight gain, and risk of cancer are only some of what too much sugar does to your body.
There are also effects of sugar on the brain that we should know. It reduces the production of memory factors that can lead to dementia and Alzheimer’s disease.
So allow me to remind us all
9. Don’t watch too much TV and be idle
It’s so easy to get carried away watching TV for hours and hours. Whatever your excuse is, spending too much time on TV is not really recommendable. Because you’ll miss out doing other things and it will discourage you from being creative.
As time never comes back, we should be wise in how we spend our time. Entertain yourself with some amusing TV programs that you like, but don’t let yourself watch TV for long hours.
10. Don’t be a perfectionist
As much as you want things to be perfect, there is no perfection in this life. None. Zero.
So, you must stop trying to be perfect. You should avoid being a perfectionist.
Just keep trying and doing.
Because if you stop trying just because you don’t find it perfect, you’ll end up being miserable and stop yourself from learning, growing, and progressing.
11. Don’t cause other people inconvenience
Sometimes it’s so easy to just do things the way we want to do without considering other people.
But if that means we easily annoy and irritate people, then we should avoid doing it.
We should treat other people the way we want to be treated.
I think we all should aim to start taking responsibility for others and not cause other people inconvenience. Perhaps this way can help us create a better world. Maybe one day.
12. Don’t talk harshly to other people
It doesn’t feel good listening to someone talk harshly to others. Let alone being spoken to. So, to better ourselves, we should stop talking in a harsh way to people.
Besides, it’s nice to be a kind person rather than a harsh one anyway.
So, let’s try to be a kind person.
13. Don’t hold grudges
Let’s stop holding grudges against those who have wronged or hurt us. Because if we let the grudges inside us, they will only breed into hatred and consume our inner self to rot. So, not to hold grudges should be one of the things to avoid for our self-growth.
We’ll end up full of hate and anger that we’ll be a miserable person and find it difficult to move on.
The best way to let go of our grudges is by forgiving those who caused our resentment, take the lessons from what happened, and move on. If you need a bit of time and space for this, then stay away from the person or situation that caused the problem until you have peace with it.
14. Don’t be hard on you
Every one of us wants to be able to attain our goals and succeed in achieving our dreams.
We’ll set the plan, and put our best efforts to get what we want. We’ll work hard towards the goals until we burnout.
Don’t do this.
It’s okay to work hard and all, but you have to allow yourself to breathe as well. Don’t be hard on yourself that you get burnt out. Let yourself appreciate your wins, big and small, as well as take struggle, hardship, and maybe even failure as your learning process.
15. Don’t complain about things unnecessarily
Instead of wasting your energy in complaining about many things unnecessarily, try to focus on every good thing that you get and have. Appreciate it. Be thankful for it.
So you can be more positive.
Because complaining can rewire your brain into the negativity that can cause brain damage and health issues, i.e. stroke, diabetes, high cholesterol, Alzheimer disease, etc.
16. Don’t be lazy to do exercise
As the Latin saying goes “Mens Sana In Corpore Sano” a sound mind in a healthy body. It’s only natural if being healthy becomes one of our self-improvement goals.
And we know that one of the ways to stay healthy is by doing exercise.
So if you’ve been delaying to start doing exercise, and you can’t be bothered to exercise, then perhaps it is now time to change.
Stop being lazy to do regular exercise. Choose something as easy as walking exercise. Just keep moving and get sweating.
17. Don’t overeat
At times we may find it easy to end up overeating. Especially when we’re having good food and good company. However, we also know that overeating is not favourable for our health.
18. Don’t dwell on the past
Whether you have a happy past or a sad past, just don’t dwell on the past. Whatever happened in the past let it stay in the past. You should only take lessons from it, but do move on to live your present.
Because if you dwell on the past, you’ll tend to compare your present with it.
This can make things difficult for you to accept your present life and to live your present moments mindfully.
Just leave the past behind. Let’s move on.
19. Don’t let things cluttered at home
A decluttered and tidy house always looks better and feels good, don’t you think? Because everything will be at its place with enough things.
But, some people find it hard to get rid of stuff. Letting go of sentimental things is difficult for them.
However, not only a decluttered house feels neat and tidy, but it also helps us sleep better, improve our productivity, reduce stress, etc.
So, let’s not let things clutter in the house.
20. Don’t be lazy to do things that matter
When it comes to something that matters, it’s not necessarily guaranteed that every one of us will jump into action. Often we’re just simply lazy to do it.
For example, making healthy food, doing exercise, helping others, etc.
So, we should stop being lazy to do things that matter. As the saying goes, “you’ll reap what you sow”.
Therefore, we should try our best to only do good things so that we’ll get good rewards later on 😉.
Final thoughts on things you should avoid to better yourself
I’m not sure about you, but I personally find all the things on the list above are things that I often do without realising.
Underestimating myself, being judgmental towards others and myself, procrastinating, being hard on myself, and being lazy to do exercise, etc. These are only some of the obvious things to avoid that I need to work on.
Hopefully, now we pointed out things that can hinder our self-growth, we’ll be able to avoid as them.
And you may also want to check why you shouldn’t aim at being happy and that there’s something better to pursue. That is contentment.
All the best.